sisterhood

i bet u have heard of sisterhood right?. in xoxo it is more like zeta beta zeta clan. normally used in best friend  forever or bff thingy. i know this is not my style of writing. but i do not know how else i could express the regrets i had today.

first thing first,

i had discovered that i am easily replaced by the person that ONCE i loved the most. it doesn't hurt me that bad.cause the place had never been mine all along. but the lies that 'the person' put into just to make me believe that 'the person' is no other than one hell of truth speaker. after all lets the past be history and remain silent. it is not about the place but its about how karma works things differently to me. i never did such thing to people that  karma has to repay me that way. it make me learn that i had to hurt one time to be happy in another time.

second,

i found that the sisterhood thing had do their job. but this time around, its not the bff but its in the blood ties. i always believe that karma and sisterhood will never work out.this time i failed to have believe anymore. it broke my heart to learn that my real biological sister had the same karma like i did. it hurt me so much to learn that she had to feel what i feel. and i scared me to death to think that what happen to me might happen to her, which in some way it had already happen. and i have doubt in everything now. because i always wanted her to be happy .

this time, i failed to stand. my walls had collapsed.

 i have fallen on my knees, in front of people, breaking down and cried...

and i cried so hard. and this had never happen to me.

world shouldn't work this way

dunia memang zalim kerana manusia-manusianya. 

sebab zalim kekuatan yg selama ni ada, runtuh macam tu je.

dunia tidak adil kerana manusianya.

tak cukupkah seorang yang merasa?

manusia perlu belajar puas dengan pilihan.

mereka perlu belajar dari kemaafan.

dan mereka perlu mula tahu,

jika bukan mereka yang merasa anak-anak mereka yang akan jadi mangsa dunia.

itu lah keputusan untuk karma dan pertalian darah.

*i have fallen on my knees and breaking down at the point where i dont know how to stand back up again.